No. 16
Once I landed at Heathrow airport, I was immediately picked up by a big man in a black suit and taken to my hotel. I was trying not to seem unscathed by my flight and arrival but ultimately I was on edge. I was still trying to understand why Omar had me go and come here. When I arrived at my room I stood outside the door, just standing there with the door key in my hand. I didn't want to go in; I wanted to go home to Alessandra. I wanted to turn around and fly back to her, going in my room was only going to certify that I was here and not with her. However my hesitation was short lived; I entered and was surprisingly greeted by Omar's associate. His name was William Burton; he was tall and very thin. His eyes were very dark and his demeanour seemed rather spacey. He moved like a cat, very swift and athletic, and for second he even reminded me of Frieder. He greeted me pleasantly and told me that everything was going to be okay, he would help me with anything I needed while I was here in London. He was very approachable and sincere. We talked for a bit and he told me of his plans and how he wanted to run things over here in England and Europe. He knew there was a ton of money to be made and that we could, with this new partnership benefit greatly. We drank some wine, shared an eight ball and laughed at some really crummy jokes. For a moment I was happy, even if Alessandra was without me.
He then got up and started to walk to the bedroom, he wanted to show me something. In the other room was a girl tied up to the bed, blindfolded and gagged. She had to be in her mid teens. He laughed at her and wanted me to have a go with her. She was my arrival present.
I stood there, shocked and not sure what to do. I then suddenly realized he had a gun in his possession.
I wanted to go home.
This was bad. Fuck!
No. 17
Okay now you may have your opinions of me, they may be negative or whatever, but I want you to know that I never, ever would do what he wanted me to do. That may sound strange and rather hypocritical of me, but that’s how I feel. Killing someone for something they did to me, I have no problem with, but raping a young girl, who for all accounts is innocent and well, just a girl is something I never would do. But as you read this you’re probably asking yourself, well what did you do then? To begin, let’s remember that I was high, slightly drunk and in no shape to handle this man, who even though was skinny and would normally be no match for me, still had a gun in his possession. So I stood there, looking at her, she was beautiful and very innocent looking, she couldn't have been a hooker, there’s no way, she had to have been some teen he picked up somewhere. Whatever he wanted, I wasn’t going to have any part of it.
As I stood there, William, who was also in bad form, kept urging me to have a go with her. He told me that he had found her in the lobby earlier that day when he arrived, that he’d noticed her sitting alone in the hotel crying, which led him to believe her to be someone he could take advantage of. I will admit that I can see how she would have trusted him. William was good looking, probably in his late 20’s, and he evoked a sense of charm only the English could possess. He had a flair and style that I even quickly took to, it’s probably why he thought I would be into his wild ways, which I will admit I was, but this was where I would draw the line. I didn’t like the idea of messing up this girl for the rest of her life. Therefore, hoping to diffuse the situation, I just toyed with him, pressing him as to what he was doing, why he’d done this and what he expected me to do, acting dumb came naturally and he bought it for a bit. I was trying to keep it light, mostly because I wasn’t sure of what he was capable of, I’d only just met him, plus I’d learnt from previous dealings with Frieder and Omar to never underestimate anyone, especially the nice ones. William remained very enjoyable, he didn’t seem to notice that I was trying to change the subject and push him into forgetting about this girl. Therefore I grabbed some more shots and urged him to do some more coke, telling him that I wasn’t ready and that I needed to get more into things before I had any sex, which was a lie because as we all know the more coke you do the worse you performed in bed, that is if you can perform at all. With William being the partier that I figured him to be, he had no problem with me telling him this, he even went full bore into the coke and snorted almost all of it in one turn.
My plan at the time was to get him so drunk and stoned that he’d eventually pass out or that I’d be able to distract him long enough to get the gun out of his possession and take over and get this girl out of here. For once if my memory serves me right, this was one of the first times in my life where I felt good about something I was trying to do. Not that I hated what I’d become in the world, my place within Omar’s drug world and such was something I did enjoy, it gave me financial freedom, the ability to do almost whatever I pleased and mostly I loved making people forget things and have a good time. To me coke wasn’t something I viewed as bad; it was just a drug like any other, only that it happened to be an illegal. It was a drug that people wanted, and I just helped supply them with this need. Yeah it can fuck you up if you abuse it, but seriously what doesn’t. I believe that if you use it as a means of helping you escape reality every once and awhile there’s nothing fucking wrong with that. It’s only when you become a fucked up junkie when things can get stupid, and that’s where all this bad press has come from, these fucked up kids and their overdoses. Anyways, most of what I was feeling was probably due to my new found fondness in women, mainly with Alessandra. Her presence stirred me and made me feel for once. I think back now and wonder if I hadn’t met Alessandra would I have gone in and raped that girl? To be honest I’m not sure, but it does make me think that I was lucky to have met Alessandra. Boy I missed her, I remember thinking as he and I continued to do lines how things had changed in the last 24 hours and how I longed to turn back the clock and just kiss her.
As the night rolled on, I became increasingly stoned and drunk, I wasn’t incapacitated, I knew my limits and I knew how to manipulate my intake so that others thought I was way worse off than I truly was, but I was on the verge of being a real mess. So to help me slow things down I decided to crank the tunes and stand on the patio overlooking the city. London sure is beautiful at night. William on the other hand was babbling along to the music, only his singing made no sense; he was way worse off than I...finally. By 3:30am, he started to settle down and get sleepy, which was when I took the opportunity to go into the other room and quietly untie the girl who was also now asleep. She was shockingly startled by my sudden movement to take off her blindfold, which didn’t surprise me at all because for all I knew he’d drugged her, so any sense of compassion on my part must have surprised her. As I lifted the blindfold, I quickly noticed that she was no older than 18 and very scared. I then untied her arms and legs and tried to comfort her, hoping she’d realize that I wasn’t going to hurt her and that she would be safe with me so long as she was quiet and do what I say. She seemed reluctant with me saying this at first, didn’t blame her however, but eventually she would relax. Therefore, once I knew she’d be still and calm, I told her to stay put as I was about to go into the other room to check on William. He was still asleep and now snoring profusely. Relieved somewhat, I decided to move back to the other room so I could grab the girl and make a run for it while he was knocked out, only once I got there I noticed that she was already trying to escape through the window to the fire escape below. I quickly ran to her and yelled “Stop” and grabbed her and told her that getting out of here would be better with me and not by jumping out the window. She was now crying and obviously scared and boy did I feel bad. She reminded me a little of Alessandra, her innocence and sheer beauty were unmistakable, I could see why William had liked her. I hugged her and whispered in her ear that all would be alright and that I would get her out of here, however, she just kept on crying and told me she wanted to run away. I almost cried upon hearing this. This moment with her reminded me heavily of how I felt when I had witnessed my own father’s death, the fear and helplessness I felt was hard not to get emotional over. But just as we were both sharing this moment, we were quickly startled by William’s sudden arrival, which undoubtedly was because my scream at the girl, it must have awoken him.
He saw that we were standing there arm in arm with her crying. He must have thought that I’d already had had my way with her, so he came in, stumbling, hoping to have his own turn. Noticing this immediately, I decided to move her behind me so he couldn’t touch her, that way he’d have to get through me if something physical arose; he still had the gun by the way. He was waving his arms uncontrollably at her while he cried out “Come on my boy, don’t hug her all fur yurselb, let me hab a slurn”. He was way worse than I’d expected, which only told me that I was either great at holding my liquor or that my coke capacity was much higher than his. I was stoned out of my mind, but drunk not so much, he on the other hand was what I hated about this shit, it could really fuck shit up at times when the wrong people abused it. At this time all I could concentrate on was keeping her safe and getting his gun, which was in his back pocket. Holding him off was easy I just told him that I wasn’t finished and that she was going to really get it bad right now. He laughed hysterically at this and said that he wanted to watch me fuck her, which was when he pulled out his gun and pointed it at her to move to the bed and get on all fours. Now taken aback by the arrival of his gun in the air, I turned to her and slapped her hard on the face and told her to do what he said. I felt then that if he had sensed any hesitation in my not raping her, he’d have popped us both. Still pointing his gun at her, the girl wincingly moved to the bed and got on all fours. I then turned to William and told him to settle the fuck down and put the gun down. Not listening to me at this point, William then began to move towards the girl and unbutton his pants, he was now moving on instinct, it was as if I wasn’t even in the room, he knew what he wanted and she could sense it. She then began to look at me, not necessarily for help seeing as I just slapped her, but for something else, she wanted to show me something, it was the fear in her eyes, a fear that told me she wanted to die. I’d known that look, I’d seen it many times from men that Frieder had destroyed, it was the look of hopelessness and it was a look I hated it. And upon seeing this, I moved towards the door just as he got onto the bed wherein he put his gun down and began to get close to her. I then waited for him as he began kissing and petting her, once he'd forgotten I was around, I moved swiftly and grabbed him and pushed him to the floor. I then took the gun and shot him 3 times in the head point blank. My anger took over at that point. He was dead and there was blood spooling profusely out of his head all over the floor. Seeing this, I just stood there for a moment, ultimately realizing that what I just did might get me killed. Omar was going to freak out if I didn’t fix this, for I’d just killed one of his newest associates, one who had many connections. It was then that I knew my life might now drastically change. It also made me understand that seeing Alessandra again wasn’t going to be easy.
The girl got up and stood there with me, she was silent and in utter shock. I turned to her and told her to get dressed, we needed to leave now. Tomorrow was going to be a crazy day. Her name was Gabriel and she was now my problem. We left immediately and fled to another hotel. Luckily for us the music had been so loud that no one had heard the shots. We were now fugitives on the run.
What a day.
FUCK!
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